Yum Yum Sadness Buns

As you may or may not know, I'm back in Boise! WOOOOTSKIES!

Now that I'm part of a large ensemble with an enormous breadth of talent--its easy for me to go into "Oh boy...I'd better impress everyone or I'm gonna slip through the cracks nobody likes me boo hoo pass the black eyeliner." especially when rehearsing with very talented folks.

Most of which are extremely inclusive. That's the one where they're really friendly to you, right? Yeah, that one.

My pattern is to internalize my utter terror of such a large pond, then go into a spiral of self-loathing that's usually only halted by drinking myself into a stupor and vomiting into a flowerpot/newspaper stand/dogs mouth. A couple of Nebraska Shakes nights ended that way.

Instead though--as I do my best acting in a relaxed environment--I'm going to take this experience exactly as it is and just allow myself to be here and be open with it. I'm by no means a lead--so yeah, I do have to make my rehearsals count. I'm also by no means being judged by anybody. I'm already here...so what the fuck? What else matters? I'm going to give my all during my time and not worry about what so and so thinks of my 'moments'.

Workin' (with a)hard(-on),
Dak