Relationship Advice To Keep From Puking

Went to see the Allison Bencar band play last night at our resident watering hole, Pacers. A bunch of the folks from the show came to check it out and show their support. After elbowing my way up to the bar and grabbing a classy two Oktoberfests I grabbed a seat, ordered the hottest wings available, and checked out the music. The band was fun--though with the exception of a stellar cover of Spiderwebs, I preferred their original stuff.

When my beers and wing plate were empty, a buddy of mine pulled me aside to have some bro talk. It served to remind me why I decided to take up singletude. It seems that he and his girlfriend have taken up two differing arts, and that puts a damper on their relationship. It's not an enormous issue, but when you're not part of someone's "world" so to speak, it's a little difficult to give advice that you'd deem worthy. I get it. I've been there. If I was dating a sculpture artist, there'd really be only so much advice I could give in that capacity.

"I like the...I like how it's made of...uh...clay.."
"Ah...okay, but what do you think about the symbolic representation of Poland in 1937?"
"It's...good..?"

Somewhere in that talk, I started to feel violently ill. I had to excuse myself and find somewhere to sit...as I was getting chills and sweating like a crazy person. After my buddy said his goodbyes, we went to my apartment to grab his bag and continue talking. Or rather, he talked while I clung to walls and tried not to puke on him. My input was reduced to sharp nods and terse responses punctuated by deep breaths. Nevertheless, it was good for him to get it out in the open.

He left, and I crashed...but not before thinking about some of the stuff he said.

I've seen stellar examples of great relationships. I've also participated in some. Conversely, I've been in terrible relationships that shouldn't have lasted half as long as they did. Does it really matter if you can't lend your wisdom to every part of your other half's life? Should it matter? What's really a bump in the road? I don't want to be the guy who freaks out at every little misstep. I've done that. I also don't want to be the guy that fights tooth and nail for something that's profoundly not working. I've also done that.

Guys, relationships are weird. Lovely and fucking weird.

Love, (but hey, don't feel pressured to say it back...give yourself...y'know...the time you need)
Dak